"I'm too fabulous to go to jail."

I work as a stylist, and I got arrested, like, maybe a month or two ago...because I went out to eat at a very expensive restaurant in the Village, and I didn't pay, and so my friends ran away, and basically the Chinese people, like, grabbed me and, like, they tackled me down and they called the police, and the police came in and arrested me. Then they took my Louis Vuitton bag, and I was so upset. And, basically I am at court today, and I hope that I don't go to jail, because I'm too fabulous to go to jail.

I bought a brand new one, actually. I bought it just to come to court. Louis Vuitton bag, just in case anything happens. I can go down fabulously. The moral of this story is always bring cash when you're going out to eat, no matter who you're going out with. It was delicious, I just wish I had enough money to pay so I wouldn't have been here. Oh, we don't talk anymore. Friends don't do that to each other, they pay for you, and they pay for a new Louis Vuitton bag, too.