"I busted their windshield. And then they wanted to kill me."

My name is Kris, and I am coming to court because I was standing on Houston Street, at two o'clock in the morning, there was nobody around, this dump truck rolls up, lays on his horn, so loud! And I just grabbed a trash bag, and I...before I realized it was full of bottles, I was kind of halfway through the motion of chucking it at their truck, and I busted their windshield. And then they wanted to kill me. And luckily, they didn't. So I could come to court. That's why I'm at court today.

Oh, they called the cops. Well, I ran, but they found me. Around the corner. Well, I kind of thought they were talking to the cops, so I figured that I was okay. And I was kind of out of breath because I smoke a lot, so I didn't really go that far. I should've just gotten a cab and gone home. But I didn't. And I spent 36 hours in central booking for that fucking damn fucking windshield. Sucks!

I don't know what's going to happen. We'll see what happens. Don't give a shit. At least I was down in central booking for something that I give a shit about. Don't make fucking noise for no reason! I'm a driver, too. If I don't have to pay for anything, I still had to spend 36 hours downtown. So, I already paid for it, as far as I'm concerned. Because, had I not gone to jail and not had to pay for anything, then yes, because, you know something? When I got out that Sunday afternoon, I was at the bar again, the bar I work at, and when they rolled up to pick up the trash, they didn't lay on their horn, and that's all I ask. There's no need. There's no need for just absolutely no, you know, just cause of honking. I mean, yes, if someone's in danger, honk. There's even a sign, "Honk Only for Danger." And, people don't give a shit. Do you want me to take a fucking giant truck into your mother's driveway and lay on the horn at two o'clock in the morning? Is that what you want? I'll do that. That's fine. That's what you're doing when you lay on your horn at two o'clock in the morning for no fucking reason.

That's why I'm here.