"They said I assaulted my ex-girlfriend."

I'm here on assault charges which I obviously didn't do. All the assaults that I actually have done, I've never been to court for, but for once I get fucked over on this bullshit. I spent about three-and-a-half hours in here doing absolutely nothing, having my time wasted by the courts, it's absolutely absurd. And this is my fifth time here, and what I came here for today is just to get told to come back another time and to have a restraining order renewed. So, pretty much I had the court waste my time and a day's work.

They said I assaulted my ex-girlfriend. I was with her that day, I broke up with her that day. She said I picked her up and I slammed her on the floor, and she got bruises on her ass, she tripped that day. If I picked somebody up and slammed them, it would be on their neck, not on their ass. Or on their back. Who the hell picks somebody up and slams them on their ass to assault them? Do you know anybody?