"I never had a license! And I'm 48!"

I was at BBQ's, the lady is going into labor pains, the person that took her there in her car had to step out, so they wasn't there, I came to 'em, she told me "could you drive me to the hospital?" I drove her to the, I was driving her to the hospital, the officer stops, say, "hey, the windows on the van is too dark." He asked for my driver's license. I say "I don't have one." They get me downtown to the courts and say "you were driving with a suspended license." So, I come to court today, they tell me to go to DMV to get my license straightened out. I never had a license! And I'm 48! So, I don't know what their problem is, but I'm going to DMV, anyway.

Oh, I was eating some honey-roasted chicken and french fries. I've been driving all my life. They just gave me a summons and told me to go on, and I paid it. I always have the registration. They just give me a summons and say "listen, just go ahead about your business, pay the summons." Yeah, I'm going down there to get one immediately. Oh, that's easy. I've been driving for over thirty years, I can take the test with my eyes closed. Money's tight right now. Hey, it was easier then, it was easier driving 'cause they never stopped people for their license...the infractions they stop people now is, like, ridiculous. Oh, I always have a car to drive. Never a problem. I know a lot of people.